Thursday, December 13, 2007

let it be......



few days seem better, few seem good and few seem great.
is it the thought that flows in your mind that depicts the days?
if it is then let their be free thoughts of life...like a flowing river, that moves between green jungles and pleasant valleys.that quenches thirst for the living and takes in the souls..let it be like the Ganges....pure yet real...lost yet finds it's soul in the soul called Varanasi....

* pic courtesy Google images

Monday, December 10, 2007

what and whom does me listen toooooooooooooo

then there was no no there were days of no work......

i end up deciding ways to spend time when i am no working. so here i was trying to value time i have and make a way to the creative juices.however i realised that i do excatly the oposite of what someone tells me including my own mind!!!!!!!!

Sunday, December 9, 2007

Change

Noticed this pattern in me for the past few years. tend to change few things very often or more like loose interest fast. is it a Psychological disorder? i am not sure. was speaking to a friend yesterday about patterns that effect you. I guess i figured that it did effect me. been trying to get over it and move on. is it possible to sit in a shrinks chair and get the details out? like getting it out of the gut.

hmmm suckered big time in life again i guess......lets see if this month helps and the self analysis brings out a new me.............

Wednesday, December 5, 2007

today

today was just another day,as i got up thinking will it end well? It did with a couple of laughs,a fight of jealousy,a few bad words and a few hugs..loadsa work and a warm dinner with him and then back home where my heart is.........

Tuesday, December 4, 2007

today

there were days when all the light was wrapped up in a single smile
i am still the same , the light is back, so get on the high life and give me the smile. i just discovered this while talking to a friend in a cafe. i realised that the light was shut by me and it needs to get out and spread the magic........

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

The this and The that....

ever wondered why they told you that all dead beings are stars in the sky.
that all stars are your family of dead.

ever wondered why they told you that the moon has your great gran sitting in it.
that i used to wonder where the hell does she pee??

ever wondered when your elder brother told you that rain is nothing but god's pissing.
that i feel stupid for believing him.

ever wondered why they have Holli,Diwali for Hindus and not for other crusaders.
that i wonder today is a step forward.

ever wondered why you are the only one that gets irritated when mom is sitting next to you and is blasting over nothing.
that she is right next to me now is making me insane

ever wondered who came up with the dress code for men and women.
that i wear trousers and he cannot wear Saree.

i wonder about a lot more and i wonder more..i Will keep wondering till attain death...ever wondered what death is all about !!!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, September 4, 2007

Life Lesson Part I


Water showed me the way, to the truth of life.
Flow like me and learn to move, cause ahead of you lie duties unknown.....

Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Peace.....

my city was target to the terrorist attacks on Saturday the 25th of August. Just after 60 years and 10 days of being an independent nation.

We were all watching news and celebrating what is called the LAkshmi Puja and Few others were out to visit the gardens and eat at chat house...

Around 7.30 when 500 of them were sitting in the quite Lumibini Park and enjoying the laser show, the bomb made it way and peeled the men,women and children apart....Few were at the Gokul chat which is famous for its yummy chats, relishing their waut through dishes and bang struck the bomb.Within minutes the laser show was sprinkled with red blood and Gokul turned into a mi sh mash of bodies....

Hands,legs, head open, screws and nuts in bodies were found and kids were not spared too....this is how gory the city was on Saturday the 25th of August.....

Why i am i writing about this stuff....we can cry and morn the loss.However a look at the scene and you will want to take these cowards and thrash them hard. maybe just shoot them point blank.

But we decided we will not act like them, we decided we will fight back. we decided we will stand united and show them that it takes a lot to CRUSH us.....

We are organizing a peace march on the 1rst of SEPTEMBER, Saturday at MMTS near EAT street. the rally is supported by Lions Club and Sailing Federation is joining the force....We the "Peace Warriors" will kill these cowards from the root....join us and make it happen....join hands and lets make a strong chain...a human chain so strong that no one, i mean not even the one below or above can break it.....

Bring the faith in humanity back...fight against the evil and fight against terror...

Be there for sure in person or in prayers and thoughts....BE STRONG..........

Blast "Our City"

Friday, August 24, 2007

grey skies


it is just like a part of the life i lead
it brings in showers of tiny greed
it stays away when needed most...



my grey skies are always dull, loom, torn apart from the real world...
they ask me now questions, they give me no words...
it is just that today i discovered...
they were waiting for me to pull the clouds apart...
to let them rain and shower bliss....

I for my part have to keep the promise...
the promise of showers will fall on your face...
tingling the insides of your soul....
making you feel a part of me...

Wednesday, August 22, 2007

relationship etc etc....



Lust is easy. Love is hard. Like is most important. ~Carl Reiner

there are many things that make me wonder about relationships. i have seen few friends who are in beautiful ones and few who in it just for security. the whole point being that i look up to the ones who make it worth it.i mean dont we all?

we all learn a lot from the past relationships. we learn not to repeat the silly goofs or we learn to give more. personally i feel that as each one goes by a better you comes out. like

i know a couple, my dear A & S, u know it is like being around magic when you with them. not that they are sweet or romantic or they kiss and hug. it is just cause you can feel the warmth and trust between them. there is this vibe that feels and makes their world better. these are the ones who fall in love and know that there is a bond intact, which will stay for life and remain after.

aren't we all the same? yes we all are, however at the end of the day being in a great realtionship makes u happy. it makes you feel that need to improve. it makes u want to learn new things and give in more.

the basic thing is that you have to first learn to love yourself and then give it to others. a realationship is stronger between two people who really like each other. so, try and learn to like your partner. do not get into it just for the heck of it. you know u will fall apart after the show ends...

talk a lot and commnicate, learn to like each other genuinely,enjoy the time and you will see the differnce. all of us tend to wait for the other to come to us, may be we can make the difference and be that person. if you see a point that is not seen by him or her, argue about it. a good argument helps you a lot....talk,talk to him/her everyday.

also another thing that i feel is the most important is change. as they say change is the only thing that is stable...so learn to the change it can be a little hard on you or him but it works....

I am writing this as am accepting the changes in me and for better or worse

Monday, August 20, 2007

A part...


there is this breed called "intellect and lucky", i want to be a part of that....

ever wanted to hear che's or sardar patel's voice? i want to....

ever dreamt of sleeping right next to the moon? i want to. last night my son and i were there in his imaginary land...

ever wanted to see re - runs of Nukkad? I want to and feel nostalgic...

I feel like living with Saki for few days and then jumping over the wall and sitting among bhagat singh and his aids, listening to them....

i feel like going into the past for just a few days....few very few i promise....







Deepthi Tanikella

Thursday, August 16, 2007

Truth or .........

We are so accustomed to disguise ourselves to others that in the end we become disguised to ourselves.


Francois de La Rochefoucauld
French author & moralist (1613 - 1680)

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Home At last........

A day spent with family on Independence day, it was great. looking at them for a second i knew i was right, to be in this place called home.I was ignoring them for some strange reason and today I realised how valuable they are to me...a call from SN, a mail from C, a kiss from sonny and a nice home cooked meal from Pa. my day was great....Pedhanana(dad's elder bro) was online and the man is 70 but strong and using new words he discovered,like yo,and yea on chat :).....

Uncle R called to tell me that he did not go Subway,he wanted me to be there with him next Sunday and much on the 6 inch...Karthik was happy to find a CD I bought for him slided across casually.....Atha Loved the thought of me making tea for her. We ended up watching an old movie ( Gundamma Katha) and we were competing to see who knew the most dialogues....we eat pokara, we bid goodbye to meet next week...I walked in to freshen up and wear a pair of clean pyjamas....

Mom was wondering if i was alright,"not stepping out of the house are you"? she asked...

I looked at her and said " no ma I am happy being home" :)

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Freedom...


free·dom ---- the state of being free or at liberty rather than in confinement or under physical restraint:

the above is what I got from the dictionary, meaning to to the word that India would be celebrating tomorrow. India would be celebrating 60 years of Independence,60 years of being a democratic nation.60 years of change,60 years of culture,60 years of growth,60 years of Constitution and 60 years of liberalization.

now i often keep wondering has India been kept well? did we give her the respect that we fought for?? have we torn her apart? have we made her useless? have we???

I am not sure on we.

I read that the Kashmiri Pandits have been living in temporary accomadations for 17 years...
I hear that the independent Kashmiri thinks that independence for him is in his four walls...
I hear that the villagers in Andhra are tossed and torn between the Police and Naxals...
I hear that the Dalit was killed by upper caste just cause he dug a well to fetch a pail of water...
I heard that Imphal is ruled by AFSAPA and not by democracy...
I hear that Gujrat roits are still raw....
I hear that children are dying of mal nutriton in a village close to the upscale delhi...

I hear that freedom is just not celebration...
Freedom is the way to give away fear...
Freedom is not written in books...
Freedom is still not near to me..........




















....the sad part is that I only think of all this a day before 15Th.......

Saturday, August 11, 2007

my kind of woman...

her hair is open like the wild Ganges....
her mouth is soft like velvet and wet...
her eyes are a mystery to the observer in day light or in dark...
her long hands are like the stems of the jasmine....
her fingers are like vine they cling on to you...
her toes remind you of the pebbles near the ocean...
her hips are born to rule and swing you along..
her legs are fine like the stretch at the woods....

her body is yours for day and for night...
her soul remains untouched for today and forever....
this her is the she, who lives not by rules...
she lives in a land where she is her own muse.....

she is every women i know, she is the epitome of the earth below and the ruler of the blue skies above....
she s free like the wind, she flows like the river, she laughs like the rain and dances with the trees....
she lives in your heart..hear her close your eyes and hear her.....

Friday, August 10, 2007

Bond the name Ruskin Bond


the post is not about the man in the title.every time i read bond they end up giving me chills. they remind me of the chilly nights I spent in Mussoorie.

I met a guy once in Hyderabad for he had come along with Delhiwallahs to attend a SPIMACAY convention. he was lean thin and a total freak. i met another the same day he had come all the way from Dubai.he gave him attitude at the registration counter. i was like 14,15 or 16 teen yrs and in charge of the registration counter then. we had our differences on the first day...

SPICMACAY as you all know or do not is an organisation started by Dr. Kiran Seth to promote indian music,dance,art and culture all acorss the globe...

Coming back to that year i think it was 1993 or 94, we had to sit in this meeting on day one, that is where all the seniors meet and discuss about who is going to be in charge of what. So, without knowing all three of us were trying to avoid any kind of charge, i wanted to have fun and it was same with them. So, when they asked who would be in charge of the Footwear counter, no one raised hands and I did and I could see 2 more hands in the air and that had to be M and R.

We smiled and we were also responsible to wake up junta at 5 in the morning for yoga. ha ha sure we did????

we made the most out of collecting footwear, keeping it safe and returning it to the owner at the end of each concert. mind you it sure is a tough business. i mean you need to remember who they belonged to and what if the guest looses his number tag and all. we did every thing any young entrepreneur would do to keep those shoes rolling in and out. I still remember the nights we spent at that little hut.( you have to know now that when u attend a concert at SPCIMACAY, you would have to leave your footwear outside so that is why we were posted, to take care of them)

slowly the footwear counter turned out to be the most happening joint in the convention. we loved having people over and many of them wanted to be a part of this elite group. we had no choice but to say a blunt NO!

then we departed and met after many years in 2000 in days when we were no sure on where we were going and drove through the hills of Mussoorie. I think we left our young selves there and i wish to go back and reunite with these people who in a way mean the world to me....

Wednesday, August 8, 2007

just like that

time seems to pass by even with no work, no corporate nonsense nothing. it was just like i got up a min ago and vavavroom time just went way ahead. i wrote and wrote and wrote my fingers ache. i am not sleepy and moreover i want to have a cuppa masala chai. i might just get out to have one at 2 am in the morning wake up few friends and take them along.

life seems to have come to full circle for the past 7 years. i was working in hyd,went to the capital then landed in garden city and now back to hometown. however it seems that i have earned loads of friends, made few silly goofy mistakes,made enemies, came across strangers who came from nowhere to help me , grew up,had a kid,travelled like mad,got drunk,sat on top of a lorry,got lost in a station, met some famous , some not so famous people.fell in love,broke up,gained 10 kilos,lost 15 kilos....have a small friends family unit...lost elder bro,got myself another bro......started to blog........and so on...

but god dam it took freaking 7 years to get to do what i want to do in life.....

maybe the seven year itch applies to in all aspects of life!!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, August 7, 2007

Patience...

I am sitting at the table trying to write, the gate opens and my neighbor walks in drunk. his wife has been waiting for him all evening and night.

"who the F asked you to wait for me" he screams.
"i was worried for you" she said.
"Why do you think I am a little boy?"
"no, no it is just that it was raining so.." so what you bloody B saying this he falls flat on his face. he did not even have the energy to walk till the door. she picked him up like a flower,took him in and put him to bed.

I was watching this from my window, looked at her to ask if she needs help breaking his bones...

she smiled and shook her head pleading me to ignore this commotion............

He was smelling and reeking of alcohol and she was smelling and reeking of Patience.......

Sunday, August 5, 2007

Just Me

Plain Bitchy...that is wht i feel like being today...dont you at times...Just be a
B$%^& and just take on roll on and freak out everyone around you...I wonder what it takes to be the same by profession.say like you hate someone or want to just kick someones butt and you have no clue what to do??? then contact the B service and we shall do it for you at a nominal fee.Service shall be quick and you will come back to give us a list of more people you want to thrash..

Like right now I would like to bitch about this cousin of mine who is a total jerk, who thinks that being cool is new word in town and keeps staring at my laptop when i am chatting or writing or my neighbor who thinks being cool is wearing pink pants and a red tee..

felt like just sitting with a cuppa cofee with a friend or 2 and just lash out...do it. I am telling you it works like magic. pour your heart out use as much as bad words, you can wash your mouth later...but at the end of day feel like air....feel light and free...............

Tuesday, July 31, 2007

No one Told Me

no one told me that it would not end in a day,
that it would take years for it to lay quite.

no one told me it would bring back in tears,
that they can flow without any reason.

no one told me that my place would be wiped out,
that it would be replaced by what you call "good friend".

no one told me i would have to be brave,
that i would have to put on a mask and face people.

no one told me i would have to sit on the same sofa,
that it would make my blood boil.

no one told me it would be hard to walk in there,
that the shadow of someone unkown will linger around.

no one told me that i would look for smells,
and feel sick in my stomach.

no one told me that it was going to break me piece by piece,
that at the end i would have to hold on to memories.

no one,no one told me that this day would come.........

Monday, July 30, 2007

quotes me if you can.......

since Google invaded my privacy and the fact that i am in love with it, i keep changing my tag line once a day or a week.

the part here is that each tag depicts my mood for the week and day and so on. i noticed that most of my Friends on talk too have their won ways to tell the world what they feeling so here is a list of my fav quotes by famous, friends,family and some i don't know

1. i am sooo happy that maybe you should know that reason...(so this frnd forcing me to ask about her happiness eh?) smart one...

2.first it was life on SHIPS now it is Life with Ships(he was on board for a few years and now he is selling them)

3.we do need eggs ( this one is from Annie Hall, this frnd and I have been fighting over who would quote Woody first and of course i won)

the one i like the most is " Life is like and onion, you peel it one at a time and sometimes you weep" this is is by Sandburg.......

My blog mates if you gotta few witty quotes pour them n i shall dedicate a post and give u the deeps side of view on it....

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

wonder what brings future????

a phone call changed my whole prospective towards giving up .To give a heads up i was waiting for a yes from an uncle, who would be the most crucial decision maker for my future as a writer. Now I was all high in the air and was all set to smell the roses. I was close!!!

That is when i get a call from my amma saying" uncle has refused to help you, he thinks you are too delicate to enter a profession like movies". I wanted to hear it again and I did.

That is when it struck me that hey " i need to prove him wrong and moreover prove it to myself that i am fit to enter any profession of my choice and the choice should not change for the sole reason that i am a woman".

He must have done that to protect me from the world of horror,couches and much more. but again,everyone has his/her ways of seeing the world.

I see it as a challenge and he actually gave me one!!!!!!!!!!

Sunday, July 22, 2007

Regret

Not even a day only a few hours have passed and I am in regret.

I have been proud and may be too obnoxious in a way. I was proud that I belonged to those few who never felt bad about the life they lead.In a way those tiny emotional accidents did make me what I am today.

However, I do today, I regret for I have not learned, for I commited the same crime. I have fallen for something that sure could have waited.

I feel stupid plain stupid.Is there a way to rewind this episode and erase it from memory?????????

Wednesday, July 18, 2007

festive mood anyone????


a friend and I were discussin bout the much awaited puja season at home. we were sure that it started yesterday and were exited bout the family gathering and the whole puja itself...

now that is when this thought struck me and i was scared for a minute there...now what is that thought u may ask??? who will tell me when is the puja in future and who will carry on the traditions...

see my parents come from huge joint families and grew up with festivities everyday.I come from a nuclear family and follow what my gran and mom and few aunts say. If they say today is lakshmi puja then i am like" ok what do i do?" and so on...

now what after,for instance Nana(dad) is the one who lights the diya in front of God,infact parents were out this weekend and i did not even bother to keep up the tradition.I mean I have no clue who will tell my son about all these festivals we celebrate. i hardly see my friends or i for that matter going gaga over them like we used to as kids..

here i am not saying bathe in religion.All i am saying is these festivals have so much wrapped up around them. Like the Ganapati puja, where the whole family celebrates ganesha.we used to run to place our maths books in front of the lord and pray hard that we score in that exam.IF u look back it was fun.then the scrumptious meals that awaited for us..haa i miss them a lot.

diwali,dassera,varalakshmi puja,holi,sankranti and many more are passing by and i am not sure if my son would learn the same that i was taught by my gran and mom or dad or atha or pinni.

I just hope someone is out there keeping it alive...........

Sunday, July 8, 2007

WaSsUp???

went to a friends place and they go wassup??
chat with another online and he goes assup??
call the other and she said ssup??
called him and he said sup?

So what is this wassup i ask,
Is it the new lingo in the land,
or the new phrase from bangalore to bandstnad.

If ask me how are you?
I will say " great and how do u do?

If you ask me howz life?
I will be polite and say it alrite.

Where are those words which ended in please,
the only thing i hear these days is jeeze!!!!

Is this what is taught in school,
the incomplete english that makes you a complete fool.




P.S - wrote this for fun, no thoughts involved at all :)

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Before the Rain....


the rains are here,it is cold,cozy and perfect with pakoda and a cuppa chai.

Here is the look at the clouds before the rain..

Thursday, June 21, 2007

tagged on memory...

i was tagged by Abhishek about the oldest memory..very intruding i must say....

Well I remember my bro and I saving up the change that mom used to give us for bus ride and buying all kinds of junk and walking back home every other day...saving that 40 paisa and spending it on ice gola,mango,peanuts ha ha man it was fun....

Now Aditi,G3,Cm,Noonan,Dharma,Pria,and everyone who visits here pick up this tag and tell us bout your memory....make us smile...

L.M.N I will pick up your tag soon...:)

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Arguments with self...

A big hug to all my blog friends for those lovely and touching comments.I must tell you those words told me how much each and everyone cares for one another...

I am back with a bang? nope I am in fact been living in a very argumentative side of life.I have been dying to write everyday,however something in me did not let me unfold the thoughts that were running through my mind.

It has been a very high and low patch of life and me glad to hit back.Been dillydallying things and for once got into the right frame of mine!!!even though I have passed the age and into 28 I am really glad that i realized my call.

Hope many of you reading this have something that is in you,something that makes you shiver and give you and adrenal rush.Something that you been wanting to do.Make a career move.Say good words to neighbor,ask for apology,write a mail to an old friend or just lie down on a couch and do nothing for the whole day!!!

If there is that one thing that makes a difference to you then do it.

Do it with passion and guess what it might be the best thing that ever happened to you!!!

So,"head on"

Sunday, June 3, 2007

Thirumalyaa..I have a name..




This innocent face was sitting there on the footpath.I wanted to scoop him and get him home.did not have the courage...his mother did not remember his name...i hope he does and one day is proud of it....

Tuesday, May 29, 2007

color me blue....


Copyright@deep '07

Click on image for better view

splash,dip,drink,wash,swirl,swim,mix....the many moods of water....

Monday, May 28, 2007

Girlfriends....


we giggle sit and share our life.We share what we call
"the circle of love"

you can call her at 2 am and cry bout your broken shoe,you can drop in at day noon or night,tell her that u just had a fight.

she will sit with you till your pour your heart out,she will lend her heart as a shelter and as a warm cocoon.

she will kick you ass for no one will dare,soon after she will look at you and say you are rare.

she will make you coffee,mix your drinks.she will shop till you drop and say u looking cute in your short crop.

she will stand by your side in each walk of life.she will tell you what is wrong and what is right.

she can make you scream,laugh and cry all at the same time...

she was with you in your childhood park,in your teen hangouts,in your office basement,in your growing years,in a city far from home,in times when you never thought she would be the one.

I am blessed to have them in my 28 years of life..

Vinni,Smitz,Pills,Jens,Anu,Neels,Dimps,Haritha,Unger,Pia,Manisha,Chippi,Dee thnx for being there.....


thanks for being there my girlfriends

Thursday, May 24, 2007

nerdy and his tomorrow...


Aku was trying on his granpa's glasses...he he nerdy boy...

I am a mother and it is natural for me to fear for his future.however, i really do not think too much bout it.Is it wrong? well, i really don't think it is..

it is his future and he should ideally be the one to decide.

however i will hold his hand now and show him the path.

like a gulmohar sapling,i will nurture him.

tomorrow he will be his master.i want my son to be carefree,emotional,creative,human and more than that a good person from within.

i do not want him to make any woman cry.i want him to feel for others.i want him to be a whacko like me.

all the above and more are what i want...what will he want.. only time will tell and i shall gracefully accept it....

if he falls i might lend him a hand or might let him get up on his own...all it takes is a bond to prosper from today to tomorrow and that thought is too young.just like my son.

when i look at him i smile,i scream at him and melt at his innocent face...i cannot think of him as a grown up with issues.

for now i am content with his today....i am happy,happy and proud to be the mother of akshat the certified brat...

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

I Smile,You Smile,We all Smile!!!

Smile and the world smiles with you.

So, look at someone, for that matter anyone today and smile.
They might think you are mad, however just smile and nod. They might be going through tough times, might be happy and no one around to share their happiness with. So, you smile and nod, Voila it makes your and their day.

I did that today; smiled at P in the office (I am used to ignoring him and treating him as invisible) he had a surprised look on his face. However he did smile and asked me for coffee in the basement. We ended up talking about idiotic stuff and promised to do it once in a week.

Let me know if you did that.... and I am smiling at you :) wide...Happy times for a happy and better world .........

Monday, May 21, 2007

last shot....

Life is very weird.Why do i say so? cause it makes you go blind,deaf and mute at the most crucial time.

Blind - when you see have too see your tomorrow in today

Deaf - when you have to listen to something that decides your tomorrow

Mute - when you shut your mouth only when the time is right to speak

So,the above being said and done.When is the right time?What if you screwed it up and realised it late? will it help trying again? will the person understand? what if they do not? what if you are rejected? do you try till your are tired?

Well I am going to give it a shot one more time.
This time i am trying it for sure.
There is no turning back.
This is it.
I have my back to the wall and there is nothing ahead.....

Wednesday, May 16, 2007

brother...


September 1976 - October 2004

these years hold great inportance in my life.these were the years,counting 1979 the year i was born,shared with a mad man called sethu.he was my rock of gibraltar.i was carefree and not bothered bout any thing.i was flying high with my wings spread open.i knew he was there to take care of amma and nana and me.i knew i had t just dail his number,tell him my problem,share a joke or fight like crazee.i knew he was there for me,no matter how stupid the matter was.i knew he'd relate to the rc colony,to the fights at school,to the late nights and to the absurd teen years.i knew he was there to lend his ear,to hold my hand and to be there.i knew i could sit with him for hours together and not say a word.i knew i could be noone but me with him.

then all of a sudden he just left us.he himself did not know that his journey ended here in the human world.he did not know cuase he was all set to shop for shoes that day.he was all set to go to his fav city.he was all set to move into his new home.he was all set to conquer his dreams for tomorrow.that "tomorrow" which was not meant for him.he was there lying and smilin like a saint.his face was calm and blissfull.he looked like he was content and had no worries.i thought to myself"boy this is what u call attaining nirvana".

however i want him back today.i just want to sit back and relax.have nothing to worry bout.just call him or hug him and say.

"vijay my elder brother,my bhai,pls take care of me"

Monday, May 14, 2007

All about Summer an Me!!!

i was tagged by john

on 8 things I like about Summer

1.I used to love the summer holidays :(.Can we have them back and make it mandatory for life :)

2.I love the mangoes and the yummy pickles

3.I love the short nights(he he I work in night shift)

4.I love the aam panna

5.I love the reason (it's hot I cannot make to to work,had a sunstroke)

6.I hate the heat,love the AC

7.I love that the geyser is not on and the electricity bill comes down from rocket high amount.

8.I love the Summer for,I get to live all alone when the whole family is out on a summer holiday.Peace and tranquil for those few days!!!!


pia,aditi,dharma,loofa,g3,SN IMM ,actually anyone can take up this tag.

Thursday, May 10, 2007

It is all bout choice...

I read a lot of books and thanks to Miss Iyer I too wanted to share with the world few words that I remember.


Two roads diverged in a wood, and I -
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.


Robert Frost

The poet said it all in these lines.

I hear "Could I do something different" in the distant horizon...

Wednesday, May 9, 2007

Let go....

How to let go? of the memories we hold,the promises we shared,the thoughts?
The talks night and day,the quite dinners,the crazy movies,the books we read together,the coffee and the deli?
How does one let go the nights spent on bed with radio playing old tunes?
How does one let go of the lunches we cooked and the mess we created?
How does one let go the dreams we shared and the reality we lived in?
What does one do when the memories come back and only make u sad?
Block them? what if that cannot happen? let them pass by?

hmmmm................

I am letting them go or wait I did already.
To live for myself for a better today and for those happy days ahead.To see things in light and not to hide in dark...
To live every moment and surrender to the joy.Let loved ones know that u sorry for ignoring them.
Let yourself know that u are someone special,someone with zest and madness acquired...
Let the son know that you a craze mother,let parents know that you a dutiful daughter.
Let friends know that you love them till eternity.
Let your heart know what is reality....
It ain't a skill,it ain't a game.
All that takes is one deep moment,to let go...

Tuesday, May 8, 2007

livin with mr.boxer


So,i am a mother of a 3yr3month old.How does one live with these potential little brats?

"Let their be rules" do they follow,hmmm good questions? I still try here are few

1.never say ice cream say i-c-e-c-r-e-a-m-e..I do all the time and end up landing at the nearest parlor with him..suggestion on improvisation please :(

2.T.V what T.V!!! plea ignorant and give him a blank stare.I do all the time,he learnt the art of operating a remote :(

3.Horlicks!!yum he loves it,the only problem---he tends to make it into a paste and stick it into corners of the door.thinks he invented a new stopper HELP!!!!

4.boxing -- do not ask,we are hiding in the closet.he managed to spot me now runnnnnnn..

5.hugs - loadsa them,kisses one for every time he bathes and eats and sleeps and rests his vocal chords!!!

6.deethi - the name he gave me and the name and me lovin it...

7.single mom - blissful and content

Monday, May 7, 2007

dark reflections...



I clicked this to try something different.wanted to see how my shadow,the mirror and the window look in one pic.will try better tomorrow.

Comments on how to will be appreciated

Sunday, May 6, 2007

Let Them Be!!!!!

who are they? what do they do? where do they come from? why are they here?

I was reading a mag today and all i could read was this was obscene,that was vulgar,she was not dressed properly,he kissed her and son on.aaaaaaaaaaa

I feel like screaming on that.why cannot an individual live life on their own terms.i mean look at it, mandira bedi wore a saree with flags on it and they scream and give her a arrest warrant.man come on she was trying to get some moolah and spread the mssg of unity.no,they do not see that,Indian flag was near her feet.now will u wear that for one day? no you will not however u will not let anyone else promote unity.bahhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

richard gere kissed shilpa shetty,hmm freak how can a man kiss a woman!!!!that too a peck goodness gracious!so,lets all get into a line and sign a long form or application for kissing and then take permission and kiss.what say?

sania mirza wore a tee with some graffiti on it,who the hell cares man.she is a young kid let her wear what she wants.please watch her game not her tee.let her be....

why do u want to know what others are up to?what if we start invading your life?what if we say you eating with right hand! wrong,eat with left or else we will file a police case.you walking with your head up! no, look down or else we will burn your face...and mind you we can go on and on and on...

Let humans live for once in a free country.where they are not afraid to do what they want.every individual has a right to live and do what is good for them.if someone wants to streak and run let them.if it makes them feel happy then let them be!

Let there be freedom of press,speech,expression and ,let us be

Thursday, May 3, 2007

To them....

She was from a Kerala Brahmin family.Petite and beautiful.He was from a far off land called Andhra Pradesh.Came to Palakkad to learn vedas from her father the great Shankara Narayana Sravathi.He was young restless and handsome.She peeped from the corner of the parda to see him.Her swan like eyes caught his attention.

Everyday he used to look that side and wait for her to shower love.
Shy,immature,pure that was what they shared.He went back to his village.Was restles night and day.She was being paraded to men.He went back asked his guru for her hand.Guru refused.He sed "you are a Brahman from andhra,Am a Brahman from kerala,this can never happen".She cried sitting near the river pamba.her tears still flow there.He was distressed.gave up all his social life.

He wrote her a letter,said "I will wait for you at the river,if you love me run away,run away from them and come into my world.I promise to love you like a new born child".She ran and came into his arms.She came to his village.New place,new language,new surroundings,new people.Her mother came and asked her to come back.She refused,he is mine now and I am his she said.the same eyes that cried,were filled with tears of joy.

The whole village out casted the kerala girl and the andhra boy.They moved into his ancestral house.She gave him 3 children.He showered her with the love.they lived and the family lived on forever.

I am her great-great-great grand-daughter...

her - Bhavani Kutty Amal
him - Suryanarayana Sastry..

I will go back to her village one day and find her origins and mine too.Sit next to the river pamba and feel her presence.Stand under the tree and see them hug.Wait near the window and watch them pass by.Meet her family and thank them,for without them I would not have started this journey....a journey in search of my great-great-great grandmother's roots.

I will, one day and feel the love all over again....this post is dedicated to them and to many more who made the impossible, possible in small ways and left us behind to follow the footsteps..

Wednesday, May 2, 2007

Tyagaraja


Tomorrow is the most celebrated day of carnatic music.It is Saint Tyagaraja's birthday.

Who is Tyagaraja?

He was a composer of Carnatic Music.He composed hundreds of devotional songs on Rama.Every South Indian will know atleast one of his keertana's.My fav is " Endaro Mahaanubhavulu".
He was born into a Brahmin's family in the Thanjavur district in the year 1767.His grandfather was also a poet-composer in the court of Thanjavur.
He got married to a beautiful lady called Kamalamba and she too was well versed in music.His guru was Sonti Venkataramanayya.When he was eight years old, Tyagaraja composed Namo Namo Raghavaya Anisham in raga Desikathodi.This is how the music career of a great composer began.He was so immersed in his devotion to lord Rama,that he refused to accept to be at the kings mercy and sing in his court.He dedicated his life to Rama and sang in his praise day and night.

Try and listen to his compositions and feel the great sense of peace that bestow es on you.I thank this Saint for composing such melodies like,Nidhi Chala Sukhama,Bantu Rithi Koluvu and many more.

Pancharatna kritis are a set of five kritis (songs) in Carnatic music, composed by Tyagaraja.
They are
Jagadananda Karaka,Sadhinchene,Dudukugala,Kanakana Ruchira and Endaro Mahanubhavulu.
Wish him a very happy birthday.He still is alive, in the music and every note that we sing and listen to!

Sunday, April 29, 2007

Saturday, April 28, 2007

Bangels of the old City



I come in many colors and shapes,
I adorn hands from India to Emirates.
I am like the relationship in everylife.
Learn to accept every hand from me.
Learn to treat everyone equally like me.

Thursday, April 26, 2007

Habits of the Rich and the FAmous!!

Disclaimer - I solemnly Take an oath that I shall write nothing but the truth.If friends find it hard to digest and want to kill me please take an appointment and I shall FLEE......

I am going to write a few habits of the famous friends I have and about few habits that I did not inherit,however do follow and practice them diligently

Miss V
Her mom- V get me some oil from the shop
V-looks @ aunt with red eyes,why you ask? cause maam was just applying mudfreak pack on her face.
Step's
1.Get up,washes her face,locks the room door for 45 min.opens it now(by the you could have produced oil out of a well!)
2.She is dressed for a party? no to get oil.
3.Looks at the mirror 20 times.
4.Walks out takes the car (the shop is 2 min away)
5.Walks back in changes the tee
6.Walks back to the car,takes her time adjusting the mirror,sits,gets out looks at her chappal(do not match) goes in again. Poor Aunt finally is coming in with oil pack in her hand.
7.V throws a fuss on how people do not let her do things at home(hmm we will maybe after million years)

V is a responsible adult now.She comes to India and spends 99% of her time shopping for latest clothes and is still stuck with her mirror obsession.However the mirror has been transported to USA and is living it's life and mailing me her daily activities which include,American face pack and Wal-Mart oil(poor car)

Miss N
She is what you call the typical BMTD(behnji turned mod) and she knows I call her that..so it is ok big time ok....
Getting ready for work
Pink shirt,Brown slacks,Pink Shoes,Brown bag,Pink lipstick and well a pink Kinetic(courtesy out old garage chacha).oop's forgot to mention the pink crunchy and the pink bangles.Yes,I lived with her for 20 year and I think am a little colour blind!!!

N lives in away from India,the Bata pink has moved on to designer pink chappal.The obsession still continuous.However thanks to her husband the only thing matching now are her bag and crunchy.Bravo Hubby dear.....

Mr. S
Hmm I can talk and talk and he will bury me upside down

throw the towel on the bed,S picks it up and puts it in the required position(dimension,angles all measured),throw it again he puts it back again and you get a lecture on how to place the towel properly.
move the sofa by and inch,(sit and watch the fun)normal eyes would not even notice this.His supersonic eyes do notice.Walks ,pulls the sofa back to the normal position,(the line on the floor should be horizontal and parallel to the sofa legs(I too do not know how),move again? it is back in it's position by the time u blink.
throw books on the table,they automatically appear neat in a millisecond.with position accord to size and numerous combinations.ha ha I love troubling S....


S lives here in our beloved country and the habits will not die,even if u kill them..

Was I mean,rude,overly insensitive otherwise a Big Bad _ _ _ _ _!!!hmmm I am thinkin....hmmmmm

a couple more to continue in the next episode!!!!

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Time and Space...

The essence of competitiveness is liberated when we make people believe that what they think and do is important - and then get out of their way while they do it.
-Jack Welch


It is true and I believe in the above.Sometimes you have this urge to check on your team and monitor them continually.this tends to make them feel like you on there head.So try and leave them till the date given and let them come to you for any reference.It helps.I remember my boss telling me this recently.

This statement does apply to many things.Like at home with kids.Let them be on their own do not pounce on them every second.My parents follow my kid everywhere and he tends to get spoilt.I say Let him be,if he gets funny then he knows he will get a teeny punishment an all is set right.

Rewind a little - my parents never tried to push us on anything.If mum said you got to finish your homework by 7.30pm.It had to be done and actually it was.She used to walk into our room @ 8 pm and voila the work was ready.If it was not she would ask us why and decide the future course of action(which was default standing on one leg for 10 min)

I am a kind who tends to get nervous and keeps checking on given tasks or anything every second.I infact tend to suffocate people a lot. I keep doing this not only At work but follow it even in personal life....lets hope for less pressure from me in the coming days!!!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Life @ this moment!!!

Have you been close to someone? So close that you could actually finish his/her sentence,think like them,predict what their next move is and feel every emotion together. I am sure I did.

But what happens when one day the person treats you like a stranger.Does not give the key to their thoughts and lets you ponder on what is going on.It is eerie feeling.It is like you have lost out on someone.I wonder how does one deal with it?

We loose out on many people in life,few due to unavoidable circumstances,some due to fights and some due to your will.However,if someone who you want to be with let it be a friend or family or some one u in love with.When S/he shuts the door and refuses to accept your presence,it hurts at first.Then you tend to look back at the moments shared and wonder!!!!Was it the same person who was laughing with you,talking to you,singing with you and sharing little dreams with you.

You wish the times come back and wish for the best.Fortunate is the one who leaves you.....to think and wonder if time has stopped........so what does one do let go or live in the moment?

Monday, April 23, 2007

thoughts....



pic - google images


stran·ger - person with whom one has had no personal acquaintance

Stranger is the strangest word of all.I can vouch for it.

All of us have been strangers to each other till we started reading each others blogs.now we tend to form a group that does not forget to visit your blog.Like a frnd dropping in for coffee in the evening.It has become a ritual for me to visit all you blogs and get my daily dose of your world!!!

A stranger walked into my life once.Choose to turn into a reflection and thinks he is still a stranger to me.It is strange that the path has come to the beginning.Is it a new beginning???

A little stranger moved in me for nine months.He was out and looked out of place like in the dictionary meaning of stranger.days passed by and every minute of his action is strange to me.He fills me with strange surprises!!!!

Few women who were strangers till yesterday are my best buddies.I love the way they shower their love.some show it little and some show it all.It is strange that we were strangers @ first......

Here is a little for those strangers...

you walk on without any fear,
I know you will find someone very dear.

Sunday, April 22, 2007

Satur - DAY!!!!!



pic by P lol

Saturday was one of those days that began with an eerie feeling and that lasted for a while and still is on.I opened my mail to see a stomach churning mail from R.That does not stop I am caught in this emotional grill.I baul my heart out and leave home to reach a friends plc to see she was in the same state.I was cursing 21rst and will for long time to come.

However as a coin has 2 sides the guardian decided enough of folin around and showered me with blessings.

1.I mailed a famous photographer in hyd asking him if I can be his flunky for a while.Till I join the photography school.I forgot and decided that this famous chap will never call me.Voila he did and he was kind enough help me out and meet me this Sunday.ha my day was looking good, baby good.

2.I picked up my friend and go to see my bro and sil,they celebrating their first wedding anniversary.It had to be all romantic and all,we were planning to pick up a cake flowers and lots of things.So,my friend and I got out of our place and driving in a the insane mood and a hot sat afternoon and the car stops.Imagine our plight instead of getting angry and blowing our steam(for our day started bad) we laughed our $^& off and were actually clicking pic of old building in the traffic and public screaming @ us he he(i can still see there expressions)

3.We ended up having a ball of a time @ the house and then we decide to go to a temple like good gals and guys(after all first wedding anniversary).I proudly take them to a temple.Now i have no clue if this was the temple My pa was talking about.WE just cruise in and the temple has no pujari,no one in the vicinity to take care of us or the god.Ironic we take care of ourselves and the god and laugh our way out.(certified godswo/men).......

The day was not bad after all and I have taken few decisions yesterday which will stand right for the first time...

This would make nosense to most,however I wanted to remember this day for life and my blog will keep it intact....

Thursday, April 19, 2007

Me the RARE breed!!!

Your Personality is Very Rare (INFP)

Your personality type is dreamy, romantic, elegant, and expressive.

Only about 5% of all people have your personality, including 6% of all women and 4% of all men
You are Introverted, Intuitive, Feeling, and Perceiving.


Ha,I always thought i was kinda rare breed and this proves it right!

Like this poem I wrote describes me

you will find me where the waters flow free,
you will find me in the forest full of wild trees.
you will try and tie me down,i will smile and run along....
I will leave you when I want,I will come back when you in need.
I am the invisible,I am the unknown.
I am full of mystery for the sane in insanity....

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

ONE!!!



the above is "ik onkar", comes from the first 2 words of the scared "Guru Granth Sahib".It means one and that everyone is equal.

I am a Hindu a Brahmin to be precise.Now why I am I saying all this to you and myself?there is this endless debate about what religion is and how you got to follow your religion from childhood.

My parents never forced my brother and me to follow out religion.They did not force us to go to the temple or for that matter pray.So,was I deprived of religious thoughts.For that matter I know most of the mantras and believe in the vedas.However I am not sure of my belief in The "Gods".


But my question remains.did anyone see the God's above?did anyone interact with Ram,Krishna or Vishnu for that matter?.Did anyone sit next to Ganesha or Shiva? I am not sure they did.
I for my thoughts believe in those who lived with the mankind and behaved like them.

I am strange i still go to temple,love the smell of temples actually :).Love the prasad love the chants and love the choir and love the namaz.However i cannot get to stay on anyside.I am always confused bout my idea of Religon.

I believe in Ik onkar.I believe that GOD is one and S/He lives within you.You trust your own self and you have trusted GOD.

The rest is for you to imagine......

Sunday, April 15, 2007

Shine on you Crazy diamond!!!



pic courtesy - my digi

I was driving to work on a pleasant summer evening,my mood was not fit to fix anything.Was listening to "shine on " and was trying to sing along.There i took a left turn and as usual passing by the lane and the old school road.This was on the right, a gulmohar bathing in the sun ray's.I had to stop my car and capture it.My mood started shining the song was near perfect.

How I wish everyday was so enchanting and full of moments to capture.....

Friday, April 13, 2007

Feel it !!!!



a friend sent me this mail and It made me smile, go on a nostalgic trip and much more.....hope it has the same effect on you

Celebration means......
Four friends.
Bahar barsaat.
Four glasses of beer.


Celebration means......
Hundred bucks of petrol.
A rusty old bike.
And an open road.

Celebration means......
Maggi noodles.
A hostel room.
4.25 a.m.

Celebration means......
3 old friends.
3 separate cities.
3 coffee mugs.
1 Internet messenger.

Celebration means...... Rain on a hot tin roof.
Pakoras deep-frying.
Neighbors dropping in.
A party.

Celebration means......
You and mom.
A summer night.
A bottle of coconut oil.
A head massage.

Thursday, April 12, 2007

Appraisal is the in thing Honey....





Here is bit of what I go through....

My mind stopped thinking for the past few hours.Now it is normal when asked to sleep,smoke,eat,talk or do any random thing.It only goes into coma when asked to write about myself in my appraisal.

Yes,that is what I am shaking and going craze over.I am kind of confused over what I have done in the past 6 months.I.e after my first performance review.The reasons being unlike the whole world my job has no specified KRA(key responsible areas).I kind of manage many things.Jim of all trades.However,this is one time of the year where I got to pull in all the mails dated year 1600. It is tad difficult to as few of them have been archive.So,what do I do.I write and rewrite things I have done.Now,this means I got to boast of the good and data specific work I have done.

I got neat friends in office who stand next to me and go like "deepthi this this this is what you have done on that date or "wait I have copy of all the mails you sent" or" here is the for you".Seriously love you guys for that and thanks.(your treat chai @ bus stop).

So self appraisal is nothing but you got to praise yourself till you get that 5 pointer.I need that 5 pointer badly.I need for a growth,more job responsibilities,more training in a cool resort.the most imp thing more money honey...

I heard one of the guys in office saying what is in a position and why do u need one? Well I do need one to get a great pay pack when I leave and to ensure I have achieved great deal @ my work place.I am after all a normal human who deserves things worth the work I put in right?????

Here is bit of what I go through....

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

SOmething that a website had to tell me????

I was going through CM's blog and got on to a site which has funny and intresting things like the below and thought I'd try and voila It had to happen..I am not sure how....



Your True Love Is an Aries

Why you'll love an Aries:

An Aries has the red-hot seduction skills to woo you
Never boring, an Aries will give you the romantic challenge you crave!

Why an Aries will love you:

You have the intensity and energy to go head to head with your Aries...
And the undying passion to keep an Aries coming back for more.

and here I present the Biryani.....

ok here we go.....

Biryani ummm mouth waters,taste buds tangle and I just want to get there and grab the goddam Biryani now...I am from the city that is famous for food.If you are a guest of our city,we will never ever let you go without taking you to Paradise,Bawarchi,Old city.We will force you to eat out Biryani and wait till you fill your heart and stomach and then say "wah wah".The biryani is the word for the hour,day,week,month and year here.

so,how did it arrive here.I hope it was not parceled in silver foil and mailed overnight? actually the Emperor Aurangzeb got this touch to our land when he was here in 1600.He came along with a couple of governors and one of them stayed behind...

This comes in 2 kinds the Katchi and the Pakki.The huge difference is in the preparation method.The name comes from Perisan word biriani which means fired or roasted.The nizmas kitchen boasted 49 kinds of this biryani.Another popular version is the Awadhi biryani.The vegetarian version is called Tehri .

Please find the recipe here and may your taste buds love mua....




Hyderabadi Biryani

Ingredients

Meat - 1 KG Boneless
Basmati Rice - 1/2kg
Onion - 2 Big
Lime Juice - 1/4 Cup
Curd - 500 GM
Ginger Garlic Paste - 4-6 Tsp.
Red Chilli Powder - 1/2 Tsp.
Green Chilli - 4-6 grind into fine past
Shazeera - A Pinch of Shazeera
Clove - 1-2
Cinamon - 1-2
Cardamon - 2-3
Coriander Leaves - A bunch finely chopped
Mint leaves - 8-10 sticks - Plucked only leaves
Safron - 2 pinch of safron, immerse in water
Safron color - A pinch of color liquified with water
Ghee - 2 Tsp.
Oil - 2 Cup oil
Salt - To taste

Method:


Cut the meat into 4" square pieces and wash it
Add ginger garlic paste to the washed meat and Marinate it for 1 hour.
While marinating you cut the onions thinly lengthwise and Fry the onions in the oil on low flame till it becomes golden brown.
Now remove the golden brown onions from the oil and spread it on the plate, when it cool then crush it with your hand.
Now add the curd 3/4 part of crushed fried onion, Red chilli powder, Green chilli paste, Cinamon, Cardamon, Shazeera, Clove, Coriander leaves, Mint leaves and safron water, salt to taste and remaining part of the oil into this marinated meat and leave for one hour.
After one hour take basmati rice and washed and now pour water into the rice as you cook it and add salt one tea spoon, Cinamon, Cardamon, Shazeera, Clove, Coriander leave, mint leave, Green chilli 2 cut into lenght wise. Now put on flame but when rice start cooking when the rice becomes half cookded. Then remove it flame. Drain out the water completly. Now spread this half cooked rice on the marinated meat. Upon the rice layer you spread lime juice, saffron color and ghee and remaining part of the crushed onion.
Now cover the utensil with lid tightly. Keep it on a very low flame After 1/2 hour exactly take it out from the flame.
Now your delicious tasty Hyderabadi Biryani is ready to eat.
Serve hot with curd chutney or with Bagare Baigan Curry.

the above preparation is from the web and not by me so me too will try and let you know

Tuesday, April 10, 2007



Those were the days,when life was just seen like one gushing fall.
No one to stop you,no boundaries around.Even if they did you never cared.

It is rather strange that you have frozen today,
have the insides refused to melt or has the hurt dried them like the summer sun?

You asked me as a child,is there a reason for this pain? is there no room for it to be locked? is there no one above it? is it you that enjoys causing it?

My dear I have grown within you,you nurtured me and made me what I am today.
you gave me soil,you gave me shade,you made me feel like a queen till date.

I do not want to tear you apart or cut the chord.
I just want you to realise that I am a part and parcel of life.
I come when you ask me to and leave when you healed.
I have no destiny or no choice of my own.
I just remain there for you to call,as you did many times.
I came running into your arms.you hugged me,kissed me and threw me away when the deed was done.

I am the name you call me with,I am the insane,I am the traitor,I am the ruler of the empty space,deep within your broken heart!!!!!!

Tuesday, April 3, 2007

Hyderabadi Heritage




I promised that I will write about the Chowmahalla Palace.So,keeping my promise here is what I could gather about the Palace.

Chowmahalla Palace

Chow means four and Mahalla means Palace Chowmahlla=four palaces.Nizam Salabhat Jung in 1750 was the person behind giving shape to this construction and Nizam Afzar-ud-Dawla Bahadur was the key person to ensure the construction was completed during 1857 and 1869.The palace is on 45 acres.However the sad truth is that only 11 or 12 acres remain untouched.It has Laad or the Chudi bazaar next to it.It is very close to the Shalibanda cross roads.We got confused getting there as it was a jam packed traffic night at Charminar.

This was built as a replica of the Shah's Palace in Teheran.Only one part of the Palace is open to public now and it sure my breath away.There is a clock on one of the towers here and It was prompt and kept ticking away ever hour.It has been working since the day the palace was built.
The Council Hall which housed a rare collection of manuscripts and priceless books is where the Nizam often met important officials. Roshan Bangla is another garden which got the name after the sixth Nizams mother.

The best part is the centerpiece which is so exquisite.It was the seat of Asaf Jahi dynasty.You have to take a look at it and it takes your breath,heart everything away for few minutes.It is mind blowing.Chowmahalla, apparently had more then 7000 attendants and has been compared to the ‘Enchanted Gardens of the Arabian Nights’.(Now that is for records)

If and when you in Hyderabad or the city of pearls take time out to visit this magnificent structure.It has to be on your list of places to see before I Die list.

Out of my experience I have to tell you it was hypnotising to be there.I was looking up while I was in the concert to see if there are any Princely Ghosts around to tell me the history of the palace

Saturday, March 31, 2007

Ragaam,Taanam and Pallavi




That is how my Saturday evening was spent.Under the massive roof called the sky,with lights from the heaven above and the Usatad with his young sons.

Hyderabad Times is on festive mood for the month of April.Summer has begun with the right note for us here.

A friend and I were at Chowmahala palace(see the pic) sitting down in the traditional way on a gadda,with hyderabadis around and listening to Ustad Amjad Ali Khan and his young sons Aman and Ayaan Ali Khan.What would one expect from this amazing combo.

The evening began with a tense traffic and non stop jams.Friend and I were getting tensed about missing the show.We were in what you called the human traffic torture cell for like 45 min.Thank god the vehicles decided to move(more like pedestrians decided not to walk in the middle of the road) and we reached the Palace.Waited outside for another friend who was getting us the passes.She missed the whole show cause she was stuck in the jam for like one hour.So she called it quits.So,what happens? a kind soul approaches us and sez"aap show miss hore,chalo andar chalo"(means u missing the show so go in) and we jumped and ran....

We were just in time to get out and parked right in front of the sound area.Just than began one of the many hypnotic moods in my life.I always have this smile on ma face when I sit for a recital.Let it be Ustad Amjad Ali,Sree Gangu Bai hangal Guru or Gundecha Bandu brothers.I was lucky to have my friend who shared the same taste.He began enticing the audience with three raagas.I loved the raag Ganesh Kalyani. He composed this in the memory of the Late Rajeev Gandhi.If you get this online download it.

The younger generation took the stage for the second hour.They played,however to get to where the Ustad is they would take some more time.

It was then that we were feasted with a perfect blend of music.

The father and sons played in symphony.Rabindranath provided them with inspiration from the era that indulged India and pampered the mother with rabindra sangeet.He played Ekla Chalo a pure bangali song.(I am going to learn this from my friend)
They then played Raag Kiranvani and the old lady next to me was hummin a traditional song along with Ustad.It was more like he was playing and she was singing for me!!!!

The best part of the evening was that my friend and I were extremely lucky to be surrounded by the generation of woman who were there to show the future what music meant.Like the technical manager who knew everything about raagas and was there with her family.She was telling her kids about arohan and avrohan,about the tabla and the sarood.She was excited for every chord that was played and she made our day by sitting next to us.Like the old lady next to me who was in her world of music,who sang for herself and for her soul....

Finale got over and it was then that I realised and always do, that India is a country of rich culture and we the future generation have to take a vow to protect it.We should not forget the old for the new and the hindustani/carnatic for hip hop or trance.Let us join hands and store the wealth and grow it and respect it like a "Grand Old Lady"

Thursday, March 29, 2007

Honesty is the best Policy????


Have you been ever dishonest to others in life?have you been dishonest to yourself?have you felt guilty for being so?

The Dictionary
dis-hon-es-ty = lack of honesty; a disposition to lie, cheat, or steal ,a dishonest act; fraud.


I have mulled over this for quite sometime and as I am writing this I still am.

Is dishonesty got to be only when you got to cheat or need to dawn that fraud mask?Will you forgive a person you love if/he she has been dishonest to you?Is it that every person who has been dishonest has to be considered a cheat for life?

My list is never ending,however I have my own opinions about this.Here are a few

1.I might not forget the deed done,I will surely forgive.
2.I will surely badmouth him/her on face and get over with it.
3.I will try and not stay in their shoes for the time needed and never will be able to.
4.there might be a deep down scare that it might happen again.However me being me will not think of that till it happens.
5.I will be hurt and will cry over for days,weeks,months to come until I get it out of my system.

I have been dishonest in life and I would not like to be treated bad,rude and be insulted in public.what I would like is what I would want for the other person tooo..

I am right in stating what I believe in!!

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Movies Ahoy!!!!!


It is very rare that I missed a good movie in the past 2 years.I was never an avid movie person.However S introduced me to the world of movies and it caught up on fast track basis.Oh boy I am glad for that.I now try and remember all the good ones and not limit my view to only regional or international(American to be precise).

So I have watched plenty and have quite a few directors already added to my fav list.Now yours truly wants to increase the list and also maintain a personal journal of all the movies,directors,script writers and everything about the movies I watch.Now comming to the most interesting part of my story here.

Hyderabad International Film Festival began on the 23rd of March.This is like serving south Indian meal in France kinda occasion to celebrate!!!
I was one among the privileged few to watch

Sarafina! It is a story of a young girl in South Africa and her conversations with Nelson as she calls Mandela.She is born and raised in the pre-nelson got out of prison era.She tells you the story of every kid.The emotions and the portrayal of the Protagonist is something that makes you want to stand up and salute her.It is about the Sarafina's battle of disappointment and adimiration and much more with the Mandela.She is a school goer and the school is fiercely guarded by police.It is when a battle breaks down at school and her fav teacher Mary Masombuka played by Whoopi Goldberg is arrested for teaching the truth,the war begins.

The students revolt against the system and the alien control on the mother land.The portrayal of the teacher and the student fall in place so perfectly,like words on a white sheet of paper.There dream is of a free,peaceful south Africa and the fight they have ahead is nothing compared to the dream of achieving....

Kudos to Darrell James Roodt he was born in South Africa and made another wonderful movie called "A palace of weeping".This movie he made was adapted from a stage musical.

May more movies tell us the reality of life around us and give us the inspiration to be a human being with heart to dream on......

Monday, March 26, 2007

The Four Minaret's






I was at one place the other day physically,which means I was in the era of Nizams for like 2 whole hours.That is when I had the out of body experience.Not that I was dead or mutated.I for once was in the world of photographic coma (2 words invented by me).Now,what is that and how did it happen seems like a dream.Was at the Charminar of Hyderabad.It is simply one of the most hypnotizing structures of the old world.It still retains the old world charm and you stand and wonder "how did they do this" in it's presence.Every time I visit this place,I am taken back into crazy thoughts. Like, what were the roads like?who lived in these houses?in one word I imagine myself living that era.so let me share the story behind the minar here and will upload a few pics too

It was built by Muhammed Quli Qutb Shah in 1591 to commemorate the eradication of plague.It is said that the emperor prayed for the end of plague and took a vow to build a masjid on that very place.He ordered the construction of the masjid which became popular as Charminar because of its four characteristic minarets. The top floor of the four-storey ed structure has a masjid which has 45 covered prayer spaces and some open space to accommodate more people on Fridays.

Charminar means 'Four Spires' (Char (Hindi) = four, Minar (Arabic manara) = (spire/tower).Once upon a time each of these arches led to four royal roads.Each of the four arches has a clock which were put up in 1889. The monument overlooks another beautiful and grand mosque called Makkah Masjid(more on this the next time).

149 winding steps guide the visitor to the upper floor, the highest point one can reach, and providing a panoramic view of the city of nawabs.This graceful monument is very beautiful on the inside, and is particularly known for its carvings and moldings. The painstaking details result in a graceful, lace-like look.If you visit Hyderabad do not miss these 4 minarets and bazaar of the bangles called the chudi bazaar(will write bout this later)

Welcome to my world of Hyderabad....

pic courtesy Google

Friday, March 23, 2007

Friday Word Step!!!!

first step I take and touch the snow flake,

second step I jump and give my self a bump (ouch!!!)

third step I dance in my crazy trance

fourth step I jive!! yes in it I am naive

fifth what a bliss,I blew myself a kiss,

sixth is near the creek,my knees tremble and I go weak

seventh I cross the river,the water is cold and I shiver

eight is alrite,there is no fright.

ninth step, am there and glare and glare

tenth is where is see my soul waiting for me...

Thursday, March 22, 2007

Thoughts...

Ok so I am a wizard for the day..that is what a quiz I have taken sed.. (courtesy another blogger) It is a good ego boost for my ego I guess!!!

An old acquaintance passed way today and I got to know of it "matter of fact" all I could say was "bless his soul".Now,as I am writing I am thinking hmmm what everyone would say or do when I die??? A fellow blogger aditi was right in asking her question about death.So,am I scared of it? No,I am not. Here are few things I want myself and people to do If I knew I'd die in a couple of days.

1.I want to leave behind my little one in kind hands when I die.
2.Die peacefully in the presence of my family and friends.
3.Leave mysterious diaries behind.They can be published.
4.Some one to carry and and write my blog on how they miss me.
5.A neat rock show for my soul :)
6.Throw a party and invite kids to it.
7.Some one I know writing and making many meaningful movies and dedicate one off beat one for me ;)
8.My parents being strong for my son and for themselves
9.Throw my ashes in ganga near kali ghat in Kolkata
10.Hmmm I am actually think I can add more to this list

How bout you guys???

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

What made me think today????


There is no reason for anyone in this world to be left out and felt alone.If you have been feeling that way for sometime now look around you.there will be a blessing in disguise,hidden in somewhere in some corner waiting for you.

The above was my 2 paisa thought for the day :)

Now I have taken part in amateur photography contest.this was on a network that I am a member of.I had thought I'd leave the network,cause it is useless,you do get in touch with many pals.however,it seems like this throbbing network filled with unwanted mess(anyways that is another topic all together).So,what happens? nothing much I do not even get qualified.That aww broke my already bandaged heart.Then I thought to myself let me bring up something of my own...I have this plan and thank god to my frnd and myself.We are planing to start an exhibition in my town.Yes,photography one only....

Remember I was talking about my Smile bank.If I earn any money a little will go towards it.That is good for starts..Now tragedy strikes and my digicam that is my only cam does not work :(...The other one which is quite Minolta you see is sitting in the shop for quite sometime now.The old man at the shop I think is in love with it.He refuses for me to touch it..anyways I will get it out and start click.I will post them here too and u get to rate them and be a part of my exhibition poll....

Find my old pic that is going on the wall here....

Yippee I am already excited and gotta get this done fast fast and now........

Monday, March 19, 2007

What Women Want???

This may sound like a crazy trip and it is....

It is natural for me a new century woman to assume that all is well in the world of women.However there have been few incidents in and around me that made me think.

what is an independent women and is it that we need to blame ourselves to things that happen to us?

I have a great Circe of friends.I can vouch that if i pack my bags and walk out and knock on their door,they will open their doors and hearts for me.I too would do the same for them.However,what if a friend is not ready to knock on my door.Most women around me seem to be going through this strange phase of individual crisis.I was talking to a GF yesterday and we came to a conclusion that if we let someone walk over us,it is not his/her fault,but it is ours.Don't you agree??

I have been trying to help a friend for the past 7 years.She lost her individuality living with her husband who according to her is trying to change.Trying to change after 7 years of making her into a "paranoid,scary and dependent women" give it up.

I gave up trying to help a year ago.However when I went to meet her the other day.I was broken inside out to see her.She was crying out loud for help.I am not sure if I will ever help her with a positive outlook and heart..

I want her to cherish her womanhood,i want her to celebrate the old her.i want her to dream crazy and full fill her dreams.I promise to be with her and lend my hand again.If she refuses to hold it I will slap her and ask her to hold it.If she leaves me again and goes back to the shell..... ......

might just end up and stop believing in the word called you can...

Sunday, March 18, 2007

Help UNICEF!!!!!

http://friends.unicefusa.org/r/563dfdcc2697102aa29c

The link is for you to fill in your and friends details..$5 will be donated to UNICEF on your Behalf...I think 3 min of your time is worth this effort..So go on do not hesistate.it is not spamming,easy and 3 simple clicks can help a child...

Friday, March 16, 2007

Dance

Borrowed Friday word.....

Dance
Hear those anklets moving to the rhythm,
Hear the silence in the podium.

She was nervous,he was curios,
She prayed to him,he choose not to answer.

The dance began,the flow was smooth,
She could not tell herself that this was the truth.

He sat in one corner,with a pen and pad,
Writing and sketching,that is all he had.

The energy was roaring,there was a divine presence,
the mood,the audience were all part of the perfect essence.

The finale begin,she moved her body,her mind and soul,
She was dancing to the beat,the song,nothing to stop her from this route.

Then it was over,just the way it began,
There was no one to witness the final bow.

She said a silent prayer to the stranger in the audience,
He was not there for us to witness,as he was in the world were life meets death...

Thursday, March 15, 2007

10 min....

Have you ever taken time out say like 10 min,closed everything around you and asked yourself.

What is that I really want in Life?

I did that today, a pal asked me to do it .I want to do many things and achieve many more.If counted my fingers would not be enough.So,she said try this once everyday and you will know at the end of 10 days what is that one thing you really want....Now I can just say hey all I want is happiness and chapter close....however I decided to try it and see if I can get to the bottom of the list or top....try and let me know what u think????

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

I love thee i mean me

So,what was I doing during the whole weekend.. Loving me!!! I was my old self again.Thanks to some decisions made by me in my sleepy mood.This was a great thing i did in many days. I realised I have loads of things to be happy about and will be for sure.Now how did I celebrate the new me?By going to a strangers party and getting piss drunk...Driving through the streets of my city Singing"Rubaruu".(of course my friends were there to push the car and me :)

If you have something beautiful in front of you.Many of us ignore that and look for greater things.I say first learn to enjoy what you have and then look ahead.I wrote a poem earlier about asking time to wait.Well it will never....I realised that few days ago and it is bliss..............

Friday, March 9, 2007

My Visual DNA

Open House

I read this article in a Mag yesterday...

Open House

I am writing in my own words--Once upon a time there lived a couple in Delhi,the man and the women worked throughout the day and they came back home to there loved ones...However the loved ones included not only family but friends who lived in there house from all over the world. Apparently the house was open to everyone who was looking for a meal,roof on top or a warm hug.there was a German student who lived with them for 6 months.Another kid who came to their doorstep and went onto live with them for life.the lady of the house urged him to study,he did and went on to become an accountant in a leading firm...

Now isn't this absolutely wonderful and beautiful thing you come across. I don't think this kinda cause will be taken up by everybody.First hell lots of apprehensions,when a stranger comes in,who is she/he,how long will he stay? is he/she a good person? what if they rob us or steal from us? and many more......

I realised that once we open our hearts to others no harm can be caused and god forbid if any harm is done,then we learn our lessons and be careful. I really hope I have the guts to do this one day.

Smile Bank

I started this community in orkut a couple of months ago.Have i done a teeny weeny thing about it? no shame on me no. This was started by me to help the street kids in Hyderabad.To bring a smile on the little one's face.

So people help me tell me what should I do? I mean how do I approach these kids on streets and help them?? I really want to :)

anyone who lives in Hyderabad contact me on orkut for the same....




Thursday, March 8, 2007

Profuse..

Today and days for long have been absolutely un productive (is there a word like that)...As usual I got up very late and jumped into shower.Got few calls from friends and family.Drove to a friends place to have coffee and landed in office.

So,you see there has been nothing unusual about the day.

Then I realised today happens to be Worlds Women's Day albiet!!

Here is my thanks to the woman who made a diff in my life..

Amma--She is born under the sign of Leo and true to her sign is a typical lioness.She is fierce and protective about her tribe.She is strong inside out and years have made her look old.She lost a son to death.Still she holds onto his thoughts and lives life for tomorrow.Her daughter is her hope and her grandson her future.She is one women who took our family into her hands when we hit rock bottom and survived every little obstacle.god bless her and her heart..Thanks Mom for being there...

Wednesday, March 7, 2007

this is how I feel....

Have I wished for anything more?
I wished for something that was available.
Had I not seen the future together?
Was I in denial all through this time??

Life my love has it's own ways,
It just showed me mine and yours.....
Would I want happiness alone?
Would I share it with you and my blood????

I respect the thoughts that flow across us,
like two streams joining one vast ocean....

Tuesday, March 6, 2007

CommitMeNt!!!!

Why wont he commit??? this is my dilemma for now.I have been seeing John Doe for like more then a year now and the sentence "where do go from here?"is still on hold. From my end I have explained myself clearly to him. He knows what I am looking for and want. I am not asking for him to loose his freedom or his persona. I am asking him to make me a part of it. I realised it is very hard for the male physic to think like women do....

It is like we are stuck in a time capsule for now..I can hear the tapping and the nerves are surely gonna break...

I can jump at the first sign of panic and save myself the heartache of attachment and endless tears,(which I did not cause i Love him) My friends say they will kill him.Yeah right I am the one who is in love and I know him better..So,relax my friends.It is my heart and his heart who are talking.

I can sit there on the turbulent seas of his indecisiveness hanging on for dear life and praying that I don't get tossed overboard before I find his emotional life preserver... but hey... should i bother that is the question "TO be or not to be"

Monday, March 5, 2007

Listen..

Now, this is a huge thing. On my end to listen to someone for a while...I was with my boss today.She was going on and on about her life and I wanted to say "hey stop I really do not want to listen to you".I got my own problems.So,please shut up....

Tell me isn't it strange to feel this way.I mean you want other to lend you an ear when you want and you ignore when they want you to?? I am normally not like this ,but generally end up this way. My friends and family think othewise..they say I listen to everyone else except myself..Shash sez the same.Infact he moves between me not payin attention to me giving ear to every ram,sita and geeta.....

So,go figure out and let me know wht is good...lending a decent ear or grabbing one by force......

Sunday, March 4, 2007

Stop..dont move

I asked life to stop for me,
It looked at me and laughed aloud.
She said,u must be kiddin love,
I stop for none.
I asked her to try once,
She said I will ,the day time stops......

Friday, March 2, 2007

Future???

I am generally not a kind of person who is worried about future.Have been living life for the present and past never effected me in anyways.However,my thoughts have changed and I surprised myself this year.

I want to settle down in life.Yes,people that means I want to get married.Now I have been thinking a lot about it.I had numerous discussions with Friends,family and not to forget the one I am in love with.these have been taken into consideration.

Now,my friends and family think it is high time i get married and get myself a life.Is this all I mean I have a great life I thought?in fact do not get me wrong here.My life is great.My love though had different reasons.He has his right to have his own.He is not ready for marriage and thinks that we should not get married for a reason.

Well after these discussion I thought bout this and decided to wait.Then I questioned and asked wait for what? I mean if I want to get married and feel secure I bloody well have the right to think so.Don't I?

Initially I let myself and my guy give into his thoughts.Not to please him,cause at that point I too felt that I was being pressured by people around me.Then after a while I knew I was missing the part altogether.I am a modern,liberated women.I am a single mother.I brought my son into this world against all odds.SO ,where is the need for security.I already have one my son.But,I need security,i need comfort and I need marriage.I know the guy loves me and I know he will never be away from my heart.But,the thought of a home with my husband and my son fills me with joy.....I really don't know if that thought is wrong.............

Friday, January 26, 2007

is it??

the question asked is gotta do with many things...

  1. Is it possible to change the way AP thinks about Polvaram project(thanks to another blogger it is being noticed and hope we get an answer from govt)
  2. It possible for me to study at brooks next year?
  3. Will I be able to finance my trip to Aussie this year?
  4. Will I shake hands with camera and never let go?
  5. Will I get my son an admission in say a "good School"?
  6. Will I make a difference in Smile Bank?(a community I started in orkut,but did nothing)
  7. Is it possible for the News channels to showcase something worthwhile for a change?
  8. Is it possible for rapes,killings,crimes against humanity to stop for a min?
  9. Is it possible for me to be so intense in romance?
  10. Is it ....................................