What is in a card and name?

It has been 14years since I turned 18 and still have no election card.Do I have the right to vote? Yes.Do I have the right to complain about the politicians No.

We tried in every way possible to get myself and election card.I went and registered for it.But after years of trying my patience is lost.There are so many things I want to do for the people or myself.No it does not mean that the election card is an excuse.But,it does hold some rights and I want to use them wisely.

So I hope I get my card this year at least and go for Voting.


There is another card is has been in news for quite sometime,it is called and known as the adhar card.My dad is he'll bent on that one.He wants me an d V to fly down to Hyderabad to get that one.Are they any benefits of the card? I am not sure.But what I heard is that,it is like the social security card and one stop shop for all your ID proofs.

So let us hope that the govt recognizes me as a citizen and gives me at least one card for my self.


P.S - I do have a pan card.however,they bundled it up and got my DOB wrong.so there is another thing I have to get corrected.oh yeh and my name on birth certificate is misspelt and so is the name on all my education certificates.Looks like I am this favorite hil for govt to play with and I can hear, " that is what she said" in the background!

8 months of love and just no writing

It has been a long time since I wrote. I even gave up the idea of thinking to write , the evidence? Right on my lap,my 8 month old.Even with a live in maid he keeps me on my toes.Now, not that he is baggy,naggy,cranky and all.In fact he is one of the lucky happy infants.vedavyas is always smiling and has a light up his eyes.He makes everyone,even the weird security guard at the airport smile.

The thing is that second time motherhood got me.I put on weight,lost in touch with friends( which i am happy , as most of them were not needed).It is just that it turned me into this lethargic woman.I am ready to do anything but,writing.I think my creatives juices flow with his pee pee and get dumped in the garbage along with his diaper!

But,the better part is that unlike aku's childhood,I am hands on mom for this thamudu and loving it.just like I started writing this blogpost,I might end up doing lots of writing againWith a jest and continue the diaper with left and charge away with the keyboard with the right hand!


P.S - wanted to upload a picture of Vyas with his elder brother aku.But,iPad does not let the option pop up?

Auto Draft

there are so many things that the endless mind of mine wants to do.there is so much time to do to.however i am just not ready to take a step ahead.Right now i have word open and i am ready with a story in mind.there have been two scenes written and then i have just put it on hold.

I wonder why that happens.heard so many people say that "it takes will power and determination" I do have all that.Ask me to tell you a story and i will,ask me to feed my little on carrot and i will,ask me teach my elder on Hindi i will.However i am asking my mind to just put it's nonsense to rest and help me write and get active and make me proud

we shall overcome.....

I was all set to write my blog.Peacefully with out any interruptions,in my bedroom,on a green bed sheet with the windows open and the nice Bangalore weather for company. However,it was tossed out of tossed out of those very niche French windows.V and Aku barged in and started their verbal war.

There is always this thing that goes in my mind.
"am i being able to connect both of them?"
"is aku able to find that father figure in V?"
"is V being the right,good father?".
"Am i overreacting to situations and taking up Aku's side?" and much more.

Then I tell my mind "relax,alex,all is well".I tend to get a little protective about aku,more than anyone i guess.He is my love and there is no way i can close that door of over protectiveness about him,even with the new baby around. I was so paranoid,that i would get up in the middle of the night and think "what if someone takes him away?"."what if he misses his bus and does not know how to get back to school?" and much more.

I have overcome most of it.However,i am still not convinced about way I let V handle him.I know I am too hard on V and i hope that someday,i will be able to overcome it.

"God please let me overcome it"!!!!!!!!!!!

Good Morning

Good Morning,

I have been up from 4 am in the morning and watching movies,feeding my 5 month old,making coffee for my hubby who just got back from work.I am not tired and I am in a very good mood(hope it remains till the end of today).

Been wanting to write a book for the past 6 years.Yes,6 years is a long time to think and a long time to gather material.you would have thought that I did.However,I have no even picked up a twig yet and have no clue where to start.All I know is I want to write books and not the ones that preach or tell you to get up and move on.I want to write something that is familiar and something that i have lived through.I tried one day to write a fantasy book,even picked up names like "namerain"(name of the lead character).however,after 2 paragraphs,I left the page and wandered into the kitchen to make pasta.

Why is there a need for me to write a book? why is there a need for me make a living out of writing?I don't know the answer to that questions as yet.All I know is that I derive a sense of pleasure out of penning those words or more like typing those letters on the keyboard and listening to that sound of the letters being typed or looking at each and every letter form a word.

I thought writing can be done by starting to write articles on the web,you know the SEO or writing about a razer that is so important that you end up writing about all the things a razor could do!I took up umpteen assignments on the same and then realized that I HATE THEM.The guys who gave me those assignments called like 10 times asking me for the finished work and i had o make some excuse.Reason - I never did go beyond one para.I hated what it made me feel like.It felt like I was writing for someone else(which I was).

So, I gave up and did not write at all.In fact there was nothing to write about.I mean there is always something to write about.However, I did not have the patience to write.then again I read this someones thoughts on writing and it somehow made an impact on me.

You know how they say everything happens for a reason and the reason for me to stay up and read this was for a reason.I think it was to tell me,that you cannot be hard on you and you cannot expect yourself to write unless you know and believe in what you are writing( I used the word writing like a zillion times here).

There is always a point in life where you journey begins.There is always a reason to start something.Sometimes you know the reason and sometimes you do not.Don't pause ans think and ask yourself.Just go with the flow and the reason will come and tell you "deethi,this is the reason why you are here".I am no more going to wait for a moment or time to start writing.I will write when I feel happy,sad,gay, disappointed and many more moods.I will write when I want to be hear by myself and i will write for my happiness!

P.S - also when my 5 month old and my 7-year-old,tell me mama "we love you" and when my V tell me "i love you"

weight thrown around!

Been a long long long longgggggg Holiday and yes I think I did have good time diary :D.When i write in my blog,the picture that automatically comes to my mind is of a young me, scribbilling her way through the diary.Then safely locking it ( had one of those cute ones that you could lock) and then search the whole room for the lost key the next day.Here i forget my password and everyday I click on "lost password" link :)

I think the 3 months effect of being a new mother is slowly wading off.Ask me how?" how deethi how?,Well I went to the tailor to get a salwar stitched and seriously I was not at all happy with the thing called tape and the thing called measurements I saw!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.I was in tears when the Tailor looked my sad face and said "hota hai maadamjo hota hai" and I was like "kya hota hai" and he said "Size aur bada hota hai"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ayooooooooooo save me :(

Then there is my hair, throughout pregnancy i fell in love with my curls.oh!how curly,noodles like they looked and now after 3 months,I will be surprised if they look even like wires that i hang my clothes one :(

I don't have a single tee that fits me and all i have is size s and xs and hoping that i will land in them soon i keep them safe.My mother looks at them and at me and says "hmm,i was like this after you and look where i am now".she is put on more kgs people :(

So i started playing badminton today and i was kinda puffft after few serves.but,hell goes to heaven or heaven goes to hell.I shall get back to at least the M size and at least i can tell my daughter-in-law "i was a figure then ma" :P "even after the second one" :D

My city,My lane

Vyas is screaming for attention and calls out for me more than often.His little ugoo's are catching my heart everyday and i just cannot say how happy i feel when i see him give his toothless smile :)

Aku started reading to vyas and he read from his "magic Stories" book and keeps asking vyas all the questions i used to ask aku after i read a story and poor vyas,just looks at his brother and smiles :)

Feel good to and looking forward for those 10 days at amma's home in hyderabad.As a teenager my brother and i used to hate our area or those little lanes where we live.It is in the old part of secundrabad.We used to scream and yell at our parents,asking them to get to the hip side of the city.Most of the time or say always,we kept out friends away from home,thinking freak what will they think? and also spent most time in the happening areas at that time,like banjara,jubilee or sainikpuri.However i just realized that,those tiny lanes have so much activity in them.When i come out to my balcony in the post gates community in Bangalore,i miss noise around me.I mis kids screaming and playing gulli cricket.I miss neighbours sitting out and gossiping.I miss aunties bringing over savouries and snacks.i miss sitting in the front yard when it is hot and drinking juice or butter milk and chatting with relatives and friends.I miss not having t knock to go to any house there and miss the way we celebrate functions and festivals.

I am gad I belong to Seethphalmandi and am proud to be a citizen there :)

Screwed up?

I wanted to talk to a friend today,tried her number and that was off.I then called my amma and spoke to her for a bit and felt better.Now here is the deal, I am pretty pissed off with this friend.I am in the same city that she is visiting and 2 days and no calls nothing.I did not even know that she was here.But,thanks to FB i am updated.

Sometimes and just many times V says I overreact and except a lot.but,then I say when you give the same,you expect the same.Some say don't except and I say hell, I do.That is how I am made and I am not willing to change few things in me.Like how to change? say "oh i do matter to them"?.Once I got to know the same friend had a major fight with her hubby and called this other common friend.I got to know,cause the common friend slipped tongue and then i asked lets say X,why she did not tell me about the fight?.Then immediately X called the common friend while i was there and i think asked her not to tell me much.Well that hurt as I consider this one X as few of my good friends.

X is also good friend with this one friend Y who thought I had ego and was jealous and said it straight to me and also used to walk out every time was in a party or a common ground.I spoke to this one patiently and told her that she has a problem and to deal with it.X at that time told me that Y was stupid to say that and btw I was the one who introduced X to Y.Now after what Y said about me,X id great friends with Y and i just cannot fathom on how X invites both of us to the same do.I am sorry i cannot ignore and it just does not get comfortable.Over the month I realized that Y is a good friend and we back as friends but not the same as we were :(
Now i think it is high time i give up all these relations and just stay "chill" as my mind and body is.There you go my frustration is out :)

That Sunday,This Sunday!

There were times on a Sunday, all I would do is sleep,get up,get brunch,go for a movie or chill at home with movies and then go for a party at night.

These are Sundays where I get up feed the baby,massage him,give him a bath,give aku a bath,feed him something,get some coffee and do the duties.get out for another shout for milk,serve lunch (thankfully i have a cook).dust the home,wash clothes and wait for another load to be washed,dry them and make tea and then do some other work.

Being a home maker is not easy and on top of it if you have no help then you go crazy.V helps me with the baby and does things when i do ask him to do.What I would really really like??? yeh some kind of...forgetting that word..you know when V knows what to do when and does not need to me to tell him what to do.That is what I want.

I was supposed to get help from in-laws, some maid,but that backed out ( i know somehow that it was someone who asked that maid to stay put where she was).In-laws is another thing and I will write about those stories later.

For now,I got time to update my blog and vent my freaking frustration out.Also a friend was supposed to update me on life and they just forgot I exist...yeh,I am having a hellish weekend :) with a nice movie that kept me lol in the early hours called GOA...watch it a neat,kickass Tamil movie....

I am that Girl

I cannot think of the name of that particular movie.However I was reminded it again today.It is about this guy who dates women and when they break up with him,they get married.

My story has been somewhat similar,just that in this case.I am that guy!All the men I have dated till now,are married and the best part is, that they found their better halves after they broke up with me.My husband calls me the good luck charm.For him I was just that girl who he was supposed to,wanted to with heart and soul and married me.

My Ex's are all happily married and today one such ex and a great friend came over to spend the weekend with us along with his wifey.I am so gald that even though the relationships have gone sour the friendship still remians intact and I am sure it will be for ages to come.

I once wrote and entire post on a topic related to this and you can find it here

Good luck and have a great relationship with everyone around you :)

Vinod's Photography

They say that God gave us eyes to see,look,stare, ogle and much more.Sometimes he does give us a reason too!Well my hubby Vinod has two eyes like all of us.However,he has an other eye or the thing we call "Third Eye" and that is best described when you go and look at his flickr page. and his photoblog

Vinod started his passion as I call it,just about an year ago.He has since then got raring reviews from all those who watched his work and has been getting numerous assignments too.He works full time at a corporate and during weekends he becomes a photographer.I am posting few of his works,(actually one!) here and also the links to his page a above.The photos are also for sale.If you want to buy any or want him to click a few an use his "Third eye" then mail me dtanikela and him chandramouli.vinod (we are both on gmail.)



*photograph is a copyright of Vinod Chandramouli and copying is not a good idea!

MOTHER!

You know that no matter where you are,what you do and (who you do:P),could not resist putting that one!there is always your mothers voice somewhere deep in your head.So,for me it is like she keeps talking to me every time.

I have no regrets on that one though.I would want her to be there and talk to me and tell me all those things that i need to know.there is this running joke in our family "take a huge picture of you mom and frame it up near the door".I would not mind doing that.

She went thought so much to put bread in out mouth,that it would not be enough to thank her in THIS LIFE.I miss her today and happy that she is going to be here with me soon :D.So here's to all mothers around the world

LOVE YOU WOMAN!

Paris, je t'aime (2006)

V and I were watching this movie called Paris,Je t'aime,the other day.One of my all time favorite movies till day. It give true meaning to story telling.

there is one story in it (segment "Loin du 16e").Oh it is heart touching,it is about a mother who leaves her kid in the crehce and goes to work in another house to take care of another kid (there the story is said) and that is what is is all about.it is acted,directed so beautifully.

It takes just one minute to tell a story through lens and this ones takes that cake.Actually all the stories are too good to be rated bad.I mean each story tells you something new about life and emotions around it.There is another one by Gurinder Chadda (segment "Quais de Seine"),oh that one is too good.It is all said in about 5 minutes and the old man at the end makes it all.

If you have time please go and grab a DVD and watch it!

I will be there!

I was reading achievers under 35 in India Today,it is amazing to watch that India has some of the best and the most amazing Talented people in the world.

There are figures(that i do not believe are true).However,the talents of the guys are just out of the box,take a look at them here and you would really feel proud to have read and known some of them.

http://indiatoday.intoday.in/site/

next year i will be there!

no,no curd in it!!!!!!!!

So, has anyone tasted sambar? of course yes.Then you go and mix that with rice.Now, what do you call it? I call it sambar rice.

But today I ate something same but different name, it is called ( all kannadigas will hate me for this)bisibelebath.I know, I know it is a kannda dish and it is supposed to be fantastic.However even the sambar that i make is good when you mix it with rice!

and then i tried to mix it with crud and V yelled saying that is an offence!Sorry but for me curd,pickle any day is a dish better than none

So I just took the Nablopomo oath,It is a neat idea and it helps most of us.i mean can you imagine a writer with a writers block for months together.This kind of oath helps us write regularly and keep up with words and say F*&k you block.

Writing about writers, there was this teacher of mine(yeh they means teachers write,so story co-relates to writing).i used to go to tuitions and the worst was those tuitions were walkable distance.yes, from my bedroom to the front room.Amma was so sure that I would bunk and go gallavanting that she got him home and got others kids in the colony to get home for those dammed classes.Anyway main story lo,he was one rude b****rd,he used to torture most of the kids in weird ways.Like pouring candle wax on hands (for neat handwriting) or he would make them (not me.If he ever touched me or beat me,i would scream and bite him and i did that once.bit off his flesh near his arm! :P so proud i am.) sit on one leg for 10 min.Can you imagine a 10 year old sitting like that for 10 min.F****r,if he was reading this he would die with pain and wince at my abuses.

One day there was this kid called Dileep,who was my friends younger brother.He forgot to get his maths book.So this bastard (there i said it),asked him to strip and made him stand naked near the main gate.Our home was close to the road and everyone could see what was happening inside the compound.Poor D was so offended and he was crying like a baby.Yes this D was in his 7th standard.I can still see him saying "sir,sorry sir,please don;t do this to me".

That is when the miracle happened,my mother was just getting back from work and she saw this amazing spectacle in front,more like inside our home.I still remember her not walking but running faster than a deer,she pulled D from the bund and gave him a towel and then asked to change.She then got to know what happened.because the kids could not control anymore and we were talking like those 2 year olds who talk non stop when they realize they can!

You know what my MOTHER,AMMA,Thaye did????????

She politely asked my teacher to get out and before that she asked D to do what he wants to do with him.What did D do?? he looked and looked into the teachers eyes for about 1 minute and then said "idiot".Ha,idiot that was it.by the time anyone could realize what was happening,I,me,naan,nenu, the great was at his feet dropping hot candle wax.He was jumping up and down like a F*****n freak and he ran and ran.

Dont know where D and his sister are or the broken master.But,whenever i see candle or the hot wax drops on me,i think of this and laugh and not wince in pain!

Bang Life!

There are so many things that come to your mind on everyday basis.Sometimes you just don't give them much importance.However,few days you just ponder over and over on those thoughts and they hit you hard.I often do it and i feel sometimes that i am over doing it.So,the best way i realized was not to stop them,but let them ponder and then wander away and it is helping me.hope it helps you too.

I keep meeting so many interesting people in my life and feel blessed to have met them.Like after my move to bang i met few amazing people.M and N and S and R and many more.M is here with me almost everyday and helping me get over my fear of staying alone.I think sometimes i irritate her by asking her to drop by everyday.However she knows her and my limits and tells me exactly what is expected out and I kind of like that space.hope people get to meet good,crazy,normal people and know that sometimes,lets just stay sometimes they do exist.

my day 3 staying alone and i am not yet getting used to it.I get often tensed by around 1 am and keep pacing up and down and looking at the kid or standing in the balcony.there are so many well wishers who have given me amazing words of strength and advice and it is going to work (fingers crossed).I think the more i talk about it the more i feel like i am not alone but with parents,hubby and friends support

New Beginnings!

It has been more than a month since i posted anything here.Firstly no access to comp and second no access to life! I have been so busy with vyas and aku and vinod and the new home.that I am still setting home and adjusting to motherhood and many more things here in Namma Bengaluru.

It took a long time for me to realise that i have enormous responsibility now and that scared me a bit for a while.but then there is no running away from it.I choose to be this person and I am kinda adjusting to that person.However,this is not what I am.I never imagined myself sitting at home and doing things like washing clothes,cleaning the kitchen 24/7 or say not stepping out for more than a month for entertainment.

I sometimes stop what i am doing and just cry and feel terrible for feeling this way.I think it will take time for me to accept this phase and also move on to a new phase where i have time and space for myself and nothing and no one else.

On the motherhood side,vedavyas is a bundle of joy.He started recognising V and me and also his brother.He keeps us smiling and talking in his ugoo ugoo ways.His face is always calm and V got his pattern of sleep.He says that vedavyas sleeps only when he hears noise and that is soo like me.

Aku is adjusting to his new school and he misses it half the time.Reason being after an all nighter for me,i hardly wake up in the morning and he misses his school and is extremely happy about it.I think it is and will change soon.Also, he is got into the habit of reading a lot and reads a story called "The great sharp scissors".He loves it and has been reading it before going to bed for at least 20 times in 20 days.

V is also trying to get used to the baby fatherhood.I wait for him to come home in the morning and take his bag from one hand and hand over vyas on the other :).He has not complained when i call him in the middle of night and ask him to rush home.He promptly drops his work and rushes to be with me.I just keep thinking if I am making him miss his passion photography and drown him in the husband and father role. He has soo much talent as a photographer here is his link http://www.flickr.com/photos/vinodchandramouli/

This is what life is for now.I am going to be a regular writer from now.I need a place to share my thoughts and also read much more blogs :)

vedavyas

20 days old and keeping amma busy :D

be back soon

[caption id="attachment_438" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="blue eyes boy!"][/caption]

Happy

Made paper rockets for aku and his friends :)

Caught a green color butterfly,showed it to the kids and then let it fly :D

Felt a tiny ache and knew it was soon time for labor :P

Read Sydney Sheldon all over again : )

Made hot cuppa Masala Chai for amma,nana and myself :D

Spoke to my nephew who says "I dub you" for "i love you" and screams appachi on the phone : )

Stood out watching the various colors of green spread across the lane and home in form of trees and plants and saplings.

Got to know that V will be here on Sunday,right in time for the Delivery :D

Love all things and feel Happy :D